Dust Gold: Part I
I watch my digital alarm clock red numbers change from 11:59 pm to 12:00 am. I sight. It is now officially February 2nd. I turn over on my warm bed, and close my eyes. Maybe now I can catch two last hours of sleep.
It is almost time to leave and I am still awake. I am too excited, and can hardly wait to hear the knock from my dad to signal that it is time to leave. Last night mom sent us all to sleep at eight, by then we had everything ready that we were going to take on our trip. She of course stayed up until late I heard her with my sharp ears that’s probably the reason I am still awake. This will be my first year that I will be allowed to go with my family and cousins to the “Lighting of the Gold.”
I hear a soft knock on my old wooden door, and my dad calls my name. “Rafael it is time.” He says and walks off to the bathroom. He likes to be first to take a shower.
I get up at once and my eyes feel itchy. I open and close them a few times before I put my glasses on. I feel the coldness up to my spine as I tiptoe to my closet. I do not feel like showering, but I take out my blue towel and wrap it around my body. I like the smell of it. My mom just washed it yesterday and it smells like Sun and roses. It also reminds me of the warm embraces from my mom. I smile.
I light the little green light of my wrist watch and it shows that it is already 2:45 am. I take a deep breath and try to relax while I wait for my father to finish his shower. When I hear the bathroom door click I jump and exit my bedroom. My dad comes out shaved and pink as a tomato. He likes his water almost boiling. I smile and enter the bathroom. The aroma of vapor always fascinates me, and I inhale it deeply as I take my pajamas and glasses off.
I step into the shower and turn the dial. A cold squirt of water greets my back and I begin to shiver. Then I slowly turn the dial up to warm the water a bit. I like this sequence always wakes up my mind to vivid fantasies. My twelve year old mind drifts to the possibilities of what might happen if we are successful this year. Even though I have never been to the “Lighting of the Gold,” I have heard how it goes and how people fortunes turn overnight; with piles of gold and many hidden treasures.
Even if my family lives modestly and I never go to bed with an empty belly. I still see my mother constantly suffering the daily duty of cleaning up the house and her strong headaches. With that extra money we could probably hire some help and get her to the capital to get checked. I sight.
I shampoo my hair, and close my eyes. I like how the shampoo runs between my fingers and my hair, and I run them faster and faster. It feels like a good backrub that my mom gives me when I put my head on her lap. I smile with my eyes closed and rinse my hair with warm water. I feel fully awaken now, even if I did not sleep. I step out of the shower and dry off. The mirror is covered in vapor, and I draw a smile on it with a pair of big round eyes. I put my eyes directly in front of it, and my light brown eyes look back at me. I smile, and put on my vaporized glasses. I know they will return to normal once I step into the not so warm hall.
I step out of the bathroom and see that my mom is already up and she is just finishing making the sandwiches. I walk to my bedroom and my clothes are already waiting on my bed; just ironed and new. I do not know how my mom manages to do everything so fast. I put on my navy blue jeans and white t-shirt. They still feel warm and nice. I wonder if Gabriela is already up. She is my favorite cousin and this is her first year too.
I check my watch once again. It is 3:13 am. I put on my new boots and black jacket. I lazily comb my hair with my fingers and make my bed. I can hear some of my aunts and uncles arriving. The front door opens and closes. I make my way to the kitchen and give my mom a hug from behind while is stirring the hot chocolate pot.
She pokes me with her elbow softly and smiles. “You look hungry.” She says, and I pretend to bite her shoulder.
“Good morning, Rafa.”
I turn around and see Gabriela at the door smiling with her new dress and boots. My heart jumps in joy, I smile and let go of my mom. I am too old to be playing like this with my mom I think. My cheeks burn red hot and I stumble to take a seat at the end of the table. Gabriela takes a seat next to me.
“So, are you’re ready?” She asks.
“I guess so.” I say picking bread from the basket. My mom pours me a hot mug of chocolate and another to Gabriela.
“I couldn't sleep last night. Just look at my nails.” She says and shows me her bitten nails.
“I also couldn't sleep. I keep imagining how it is going to be.” I say and deep a piece of my bread into the hot chocolate. I suck the warm liquid chocolate out of the soaked bread. It is delicious.
“Why are you still not ready?” My mom asks my sister that drags herself to the table with her long black hair that hangs dripping wet around her shoulders. She combs back her hair with her fingers and yawns.
“I am still sleepy, “she yawns once again and she puts her elbows over the table. “Why do we have to wake up so early?” she asks.
“This is not early at all Sofia. My father used to make us camp up there.” My mom says and puts a mug of hot chocolate in front of Sofia.
Sofia breaks her bread and dips it in her hot chocolate. This brings back memories of us spending previous years alone with Gabriela, Sofia, and me left behind at the house because I and Gabriela were still too young to go up the mountain. Sofia is two years older than me, but she sure preferred to be left behind and pretend to babysit us while she spent most of the day sleeping and listening to her records.
“Yes, I remember my first time I went up there with your great-grandfather.” My grandmother Maria says and looks up as to capture those memories and continues. “I was fourteen I think, it was not that common back then for girls to be up the mountain. But I was a stubborn girl and I remember asking my father to take me up there day after day and until he got tired I guess he just said. ‘Fine, get ready we leaving are in five minutes.’ He got the horse ready and called me. My mother was worried, and tried to stop him. But, he just pushed her aside and said. ‘Woman, get out of my way. Your daughter is driving me crazy.’ He just lifted me up and we rode up in the middle of the night.” She pauses and smiles, and then takes a bite out of her soaked bread.
She continues. “The little hairs of my neck stood up as we continued to ride up the mountain. The howling of the wolves and the weird sounds of the night was making regret having asked my dad to take me up there. I held tight to my dad, and I am sure my long nails were sinking deep into my father stomach but he said nothing and continued to ride as normal. The wind began to pick up and my thin jacket offered little protection. I was not prepared to ride at all. But my dad was like that, always impulsive and without much thought to what was he was doing.” My grandma’ pauses and her eyes get a little watery.
“After a few minutes he noticed my shaking and he stopped the horse. He took off his leather jacket and wrapped it around my shoulders. I felt so warm and protected.” She sighs. “The trees around us became thicker and under the half-moon I began to see shadows move between the trees. I closed my eyes tight to try and ignore what I was seeing. But, I felt as if something was watching us from the distance and felt my shoulders getting heavier as if something was hanging from them.” My grandma says and makes the usual scary face whenever she tells one of her stories. I am used to it. But, it still gets my heart going with some sort of fear.
“Then what happened grandma?” Gabriela asks. She has not listened to this story before I guess. I have plenty of times, since grandma has been living with us for the last 3 years.
My grandma looks up to the kitchen ceiling and sighs. “Well that feeling of being watched never left me all the while we were up there. But, it got stronger as we continued to go up. The howling of wolves rang on my ears, and the owls watching us from the high trees with their yellow eyes. I tried to keep my eyes up, but my neck was getting tired and whenever I lowered them I just closed them. My dad said nothing. Perhaps he was used to it, and maybe he was enjoying teaching me a lesson.” She smiles with her straight white teeth showing. “When we arrived to the top of the mountain it was covered with a cold mist. I began to shake once again. My dad got off the horse and helped to get down, and then we sat on a cold stone. I felt my butt freezing all the way to my neck.” She laughs.
I begin to imagine a younger version of my grandma and can’t help to wonder how rebellious she was back then. My sister Sofia is a lot like her, I guess it runs on the family. But a big difference is that one can hardly drag my sister out of the house. She and her records is what make her happy.
“My dad put his arms around me and began to sing, just like he used to sing when I was little.” My grandma continues with a tear running down her wrinkled cheek. “I felt protected even if that feeling of being watched continued. I also felt that I was once again my dad little girl. The moon began to hide and the howling of the wolves stopped. Somehow the silence that followed felt scarier than when the owls where making their noises and the wolves were howling. A rushing breezing lifted my hair against my father face and more continued to come in waves. The whistling of wind between the tree leaves and the grass had me looking everywhere for those heavy eyes that I felt watching me come and eat me.” She pauses and everyone on the table stop eating. My hands sweating and Gabriela holds to my right arm tight. I check my watch nervously and it is already 3:44 am.
My dad arrives from finishing loading the truck and my mom serves him his hot chocolate and his favorite bread. His nose is bright red. It must be cold outside. He looks around our silent faces and laughs. “Mother, are you telling them that old story again?” He asks and dips his bread on the hot chocolate.
“It is new to me uncle.” Gabriela says and she lets go of my arm.
My grandma adjusts her glasses and continues. “Anyway, stories that my grandma used to tell me about the mountain began to rush into my mind. The many stories of creatures roaming around the mountain at night and of trouble making kids going missing to never been seen again, probably eaten by one of those creatures my grandma described so vivid; creatures with sharp fangs, and the walked in two legs, and growled like mountain lions.” She says showing her front fangs and imitating the growling of a mountain lion. A chill runs up and down my spine.
“Stop that mother you scaring the kids.” My dad says.
“Let her continue, Samuel. Ma tell them the real story, they are old enough.” My uncle has been seating at the table snoozing off and on says.
My mind goes off. What does he mean by the ‘real story’? I have listened to my grandma tell the same story over and over again. It ends with her and her father riding down the mountain as a pack of wolves chased them down. It is very scary story on itself with the big black wolves chasing after them and their horse almost jumping off from a cliff taking them with him. My heart beats faster with anticipation as I wait my father reaction.
He stays quiet and continues to drink his hot chocolate.
My grandma wraps her gray shawl tight as if trying to get protected from something and then, lets out a cough. “Alright, as I was saying the wind kept blowing and I felt the uneasiness of my dad. This was not normal I realized. He was used to camping alone up the mountain and knew them better than anyone, and still I felt his nervousness. ‘What is wrong pa’?’ I asked him. He just shook his head. I began to be really afraid and tried to stay still. The fog began to move in replacing the cold mist and covered the rest of the night out. We could not see more than a few feet in front of us. Our horse even when he was in front of us disappeared out of sight. My put his protective arms around be and took out his long knife out of his belt.” My grandma says and falls silent for a few seconds. Gabriela sinks her fingers on my arm.
My grandma touches her right cheek and continues, “I felt long cold bonny fingers touching my right cheek. I felt paralyzed and unable to scream. Cold sweat ran down my body. I heard my father as if he was miles away; even he was still holding me. He was praying he told me after this. The cold fingers traced the outline of my face.” My grandma says and we are left with our mouths open. I feel as if the room has gotten colder.
She continues, “I felt as my body was moving on its own and before I knew it I was kneeling. I did not feel my father arms letting go of me, when I scanned for him he had been pushed against a big rock and he was with his eyes closed. Tears pouring down my face, and I tried to run towards him but I was unable to move.” She pauses and closes her yes. “Give me a second.” She says and breathes in and out.
“Mother, is alright you do not have to tell them. It is always hard for you.” My dad says putting his hand over my grandma shoulder.
She shakes her head and continues, “No it is important for them to listen to the whole story. It might be the last time I tell it.” She says, and I feel as if the air is being sucked out of me. A life without my grandma cannot imagine it. I feel a knot forming in my throat. She regains her composure and says, “As I was kneeling there on the cold ground, I felt something breathe on my neck. It smelled like dried roses. I turned my head to see what it was, but there was nothing other than my unconscious father. Then, I felt the breath on my ear that transformed into a whisper. ‘Maria Sinful,’ the whisper was soft and somehow I felt calmer. It was a strange voice, but felt so familiar. I remained speechless. ‘Speak daughter of Adam.’ The whisper said. I heard more footsteps approached, and felt the presence of multiple eyes looking at me as if they were circling me.” She says and lifts hand and with her skinny finger points around as in a circle motion.
“Who were they grandma?” Gabriela asks in a shaky voice.
“They have many names Gaby; some call them demons, some others spirits, and some creatures of the night. But, just like everything they can be all that people say and more.” My grandma says. My mind begins to imagine creatures with long horns and skinny fingers with long sharp nails. But it must be the influence of some of my classmates telling such stories when we go by the cemetery.
My grandma finishes her chocolate and sighs cleaning her little chocolate whiskers off with her shawl. “I was there frozen like an ice statue, and I felt as if my knees were cemented to the ground. The creatures around me began to materialize. It was still dark and foggy, so but they had a blue, red, and orange auroras around their bodies. It made them come alive as if they were fairies in many of the stories I read. But they were not fairies. After my eyes got adjusted to their emitting lights I saw tall naked figures with long legs and skinny bodies. I felt something that was worse than horror that moment, I felt as if my young heart was stopping.” She says more tears run down her eyes, and she puts her hand over her heart and continues. “Pale skin was stuck to their bodies, eyeless, and with lips turned inside as if they were being sucked into their bodies. When they whispered their mouths hardly moved and the cracking of their teeth or who knows what, sent chills down my spine. It was as if hundreds of insects were moving inside their mouths.” She says.
I begin to wonder whatever it was a wise decision to encourage my grandma to tell the story. Now I wish I had never heard of any of this, she is usually light on the details and the way she most of the time says things in a joke way of thing. But, I know she is serious when she uses her factual voice. Is like is another person is talking. I take a deep breath, and hold my tongue. Quietly I look down at my watch it is 4:10 am. Fifteen minutes of so to go I think.
Gabriela is so nervous that she now almost biting my arm. And I feel her sweaty hands soaking my jacket. I pretend not to notice and continue to listen to my grandma. “The voice besides my ear whispered once again and said, ‘Maria listen well to what I have to say, because there is no time to repeat it again.’ It said and then it appeared before me. It was a creature like I had never seen before, Tall, slim, with a man’s body.” My grandma pauses. “He was naked. With black wings hanging from his back and long hair locks that moved like ripples in water. I think they were alive.” She says.
Everyone in the room is left speechless. My mom has the face of wanting to question, and so does my father. Perhaps they did not hear my grandma telling of these explicit details the other times she told what happened that night. Sofia breaks the silence by asking a question that was in my mind the instant my grandma mentioned the wings. “Was he an Angel, grandma?” Sofia says now paying attention.
“That is what I thought as soon as I saw him, but he somehow read my mind and said. ‘No, I am not an Angel of the Lord. I was once, but now I am just a Fallen Angel. My name is Samyaza, and these around you are the Watchers.’ He said and one of the Watchers came forth and licked my forehead.” My grandma says, and rubs arms with her hands. It is as if the memory of what happened were still imprinted on her body. “I stayed still as the Watcher touched me with his cold tongue. Then Samyaza said, ‘stop at once Sariel.’ And Sariel stopped and floated back to the rest. Samyaza continued, ‘they are hungry, haven’t have a woman in a long time and your soul just looks so enticing. ‘He said smiling. I felt a little embarrassed when he said that. His beautiful eyes shining on the darkness and her nakedness, and most of all his changed voice that was now deep and inviting like an untenable fruit. I knew I was supposed to be fearful, but I could not help it, and smiled.” My grandma says and looks at the distance with a smile.
“Anyway, Samyaza told me a little about themselves and how they ‘fell’ from heaven. Of course, everyone has their versions he said. But it did not matter, he said because what mattered now was the present. He told me how my ancestors could be traced back to his old friend, Shamsiel that took as wife a human and he had make the sacrifice of becoming mortal. Then, the Great War of Earth came. He fought with the humans that tried to liberate themselves from Fate. ‘He was foolish to think that one could kill Fate. He was blindsided with rage. His wife was killed after giving birth to his third son. He blamed it on Fate. And perhaps he was right since one of Fate creatures dried the blood of his wife… all the signs were there. But, that is that. When they were within Fate domain they planned to set a nuclear bomb off, and they planned to kill themselves inside that domain. But Fate had seen it in her dreams and opened the gates of Fate. The blast was so powerful that it almost destroyed half of the planet, and if it had not been for the protections that God, had put in place most living things would had been destroyed. Millions of humans were killed. Fate herself survived and more raged than ever. Most of her kingdom was destroyed and her source for energy deeply disturbed. But she flourished with the many unfinished fates from the humans that were killed. It meant she got her reward way before the time of those humans that died was up. She eventually constructed a new and more powerful kingdom, and now is in a completely different dimension. She does not want to make that mistake of having living humans walking into her domain unexpected. But, I think I will stop there with that side of the story. It will confuse you.’ Samyaza said. My head was indeed full of complex questions, I could not grasp why an ancestor of mine would do such a thing.” My grandma says with regret on her voice.
“I felt like those hours were eternal as Samyaza kept explaining to me what had happened since that Great of War of Earth, and how Fate and God and even Lucifer agreed that it would be best to send us humans back in time at least a thousand years before the bomb went off. The planet was in such a bad shape and their source of souls was bad. ‘It was really bad for everyone; I even had to feed of mutt creatures, and even humans tasted bad…. Depressed and badly fed, empty of emotion and desires. Anyway, they met at the top of Mount Everest and talked for days for the first time after a million of years. They all agreed that it was better to move humans to another dimension that was almost the same as this one but, with far more restrictions and safety precautions. God carried out the plan the night of February first and most humans were transferred to the other dimension free of their nuclear poisoning and from most of her memories. Of course, nothing is the same across dimensions but this one feels very similar to that previous one. Here you have shorter summers, and long rain months. Also there are a few differences that we don’t have time to explain and you really do not have to worry about those. The only one you have to worry is the one I am going to tell you.’ Samyaza paused, and lowered his voice. ‘What do you think happens after you die?’ he asked me. I was speechless, for a moment then after a bit of thinking I said. ‘Dust thou art, and unto dust shalt thou return.’ Samyaza smiled and said, ‘Reciting like a good human you are. Of course your body will turn naturally turn into dust in a few decades. It used to take a hundred years or more in the other dimension. Do you know why? Well not answer it is complicated. This dimension is being used as a one uses a wine cellar.’ He said my mind was trying to comprehend everything at once.” My grandma paused and closed her eyes trying to remember hard exactly what was said.
I keep imagining the dimension that was left behind, with all the wasteland devastated and it makes me sad. It is interesting how the world changes in front of us or at least our perspective of it when someone tells us some of its ‘hidden’ secrets are revealed. If what Samyaza said is true, then we must find out what is behind all this. I cannot help but to wonder what happened to that dimension. Maybe it is a world full of wild monsters and unknown creatures living on the abandoned houses and schools. It would make for an amazing adventure just to step into that world I think. As long as one is protected one could be safe, if only one had god like powers. I smile.
I observe everyone on the table listening to my grandma talking in her inviting voice that makes you feel calm and sets your imagination in fire. Gabriela has stopped biting her nails, and seems to be entranced with everyone my grandma says. Sofia is making her usual face when she is deep in thought, like when she is memorizing new lines of the lyrics from her new records. My mom drinks from her favorite mug steaming chocolate, and my dad shakes his leg up and down sending small vibrations over the table. My uncle seems to be in some sort of trance too. I take a deep breath and sigh. If only one of those cameras that take photos were here, it would record an unforgettable memory. I save the image in my mind.
My grandma continues to tell us the story. She tells us how Samyaza told her that when the transition to this dimension happened, a few million humans were left behind. ‘The undesirables,’ those were humans that apparently had low chance of survival because they were either too infected with radiation poisoning or their mental state of mind was messed up. He also explained how God, Lucifer, and even Fate were surprised when they did not die and instead became a new thriving human race that was forced to adapt quickly or die. They were both fast and intelligent, even with their intelligence there were many conflicts and many wars. Because ‘chaos’ had become their way of life they knew nothing better than to try and outsmart each other by going to war with each other in a large scale.
Lucifer was apparently enjoying this little turn of events too much. He was receiving souls full of hatred and desire by the thousands each day that it was creating a conflict both in Hell and in Heaven. Angels were angry because their supposed source of food was going elsewhere. Even if God had abandoned those humans, Angels felt it was their right to also take a bit of that bounty, after all even if God had abandoned the humans in that dimension they still had to offer some sort of protection. Even if it was weak, they were bound by their nature. Eventually, many Angels rebelled and sworn to themselves to save a few humans if it was possible. When they arrived to that dimension, they found it in the middle of an intense war going on. People killing each other and neighbor against neighbor. Greedy demons feeding on still living humans. Angels at once engaged in at intense war by cleaning streets of demons with their holy swords and bows. Samyaza was among them, he was a leader of many squadrons of Angels that were integrating to their cause, of helping save these humans. Eventually the powerful demons came forth and everything transformed into a bloody field. Angels and demons fought among the humans, killing thousands in a question of minutes.
Archangel Michael came down to stop the fighting, and Lucifer appeared as well. Michael tried to control the Angels that were killing the humans that tried to protect the demons. Lucifer at once ordered his demons to stop. Many of the Angels and demons obeyed the orders but others did not. They blood was hot with rage and Samyaza said it felt ‘good’ after so many years without war. They felt intoxicated to have for once a strong enemy in front of them. God seeing how the events unfolded sent down a torment that lasted for seven days. Humans were forced to stop being shields for demons or angels and the fighting slowly died as more Angels arrived to restrain the rebel Angels and those were given black wings after the seven day of rain stopped. Michael judged harshly, and even Fate came to the event with her minions.
After, the Holy trial ended. Many of the rebel Angels were turned into mortals those with less grave sins. But, the ones that had sin the worst were sentenced to live for eternity with their black wings and most of their powers removed. It was a sign of shame and the worst punishment there was, Samyaza told my grandma. Humans that witnessed the fighting between the Angels and the demons had their memory erased and they were left separate in remote places of the world. Eventually, Michael delivered other news that from that moment on the old rules before the Great War of Earth, were going to be coming into effect and with the restriction that in that dimension humans would not be able to see Angels or demons. Only Archangels and Lucifer had that right. Of course we know that Lucifer was once an Archangel. Angels and demons were not happy, but nevertheless did not dare to cause any more trouble.
Centuries passed and the world in that dimension once again knew ‘peace.’ But of course, even that world was flourishing God, Fate, or even Lucifer did not want to ‘bring’ back the humans they had taken from there. I am starting to hate those three for some reason my mind goes crazy with the possibilities of meeting humans from that other dimension. I am sure if they knew we were in this other dimension, they might be curious to meet us too.
My grandma continues after she takes a few breaths. “Samyaza told me all this, or perhaps he said it to me in a previous life. Anyway, whatever the reason I think it is important. The reason Samyaza said we were like a wine in a wine cellar, is because our souls are different from those of the other dimension. He said, ‘your souls are recycled instead of going either to Heaven or Hell. It is because either Lucifer or God could reach an agreement on what to do with all of you. Then, they discovered that recycled souls are so delicious that they have become a delicacy on heaven and hell. Because, they had lived the same life over and over again with different fates, but they are basically almost the same person.’ Samyaza said and touched my heart with his cold fingers that I felt penetrating my skin and tissue. Tears rolled down eyes and the pain was almost unbearable. But, after a few seconds it disappeared but I still felt his fingers around my heart. I felt as it was going to melt. I can’t describe the feeling.” My grandma says and touches her heart as if it was melting right now.
“How is that possible, Mother?” My dad asks almost flipping the table over. Sending plates and mugs down into the floor and we all look towards my grandma that remains silent.
My mom holds him back and he sits down still angry at something. I do not understand why he is having that reaction. “Calm down, Son. Let me explain.” She says and continues. “I asked the same question to Samyaza and he said, ‘it is possible because this dimension repeats itself every couple hundred years. Some scientific humans that study time call it a ‘time loop.’ Of course they do not know how close they are to finding the truth, but it is basically what happens here. I have spoken to you a few dozen times in the past that’s why I knew you were going to be here, and somehow you know inside you. My theory is that your soul retains some memories of the past. Your heart still feels the same as did last time, and I still feel that key inside you to break this time loop. After all it was Shamsiel who created this loophole.’ He said and took his fingers of my heart.”
“So, grandma you are telling us we living inside this ‘time loop’?” Sofia asks.
“Yes, and he thinks we have it in our blood or something to break this time loop. He told me that he has told me this many times, and when I asked why I did not break the loop he said, ‘because it requires you to sacrifice what you hold dear, and you have refused. Perhaps I have been too harsh or too soft with my delivery method to make you understand that this sacrifice is necessary. But, now I will just tell you what is at stake. It is up to you to now. It might work if it is in Fate cards to be played this way. The barrier between this dimension and the other is becoming weak. When it finally breaks both dimensions will cease to exist, and no one will be left. At least not humans, and God has been unable to fix this, I guess Shamsiel designed this too well. I think he wanted to leave Fate out of the picture in his mind and let this ‘key’ do the work he was unable to finish. Or at least not yet, he is not dead… I can feel his pulsating aurora once in a while like a wave. But, so far we have been unable to find him. In any case, I do not know how many more loops this dimension can take. I am honestly tired of waiting for you.’ Samyaza said with reproaching voice. I felt a little guilt on my soul for being selfish in previous lives. Perhaps, Samyaza was right on being upset with me.” My grandma pauses and looks around the table.
“A sacrifice that is dear to you. I can imagine. No mother or daughter would want to give those dear to her up.” My mom says.
“Maybe, but it could be worse the fate of both dimension fall into our shoulders. We the Sinful family needs to pay for what some of ancestors did. And do not give that look I am not crazy. I would honestly not hesitate to give up my life in order to save millions. But, sadly it is not me who is going to be the sacrifice. Fate has her ways. I asked if it was not me who will be the sacrifice Samyaza answered. ‘It is just up to you to facilitate the one that will be the sacrifice by telling him or her, what I have told you. And when the moment comes, you will know what to do.’ He said then handed me this silver dagger.” My grandma says and takes from her belt a beautiful dagger that I have never seen before. She puts it on the table.
Everyone stays still. The kitchen instantly turns into a zone of tension. As we take in what she had just told us. Basically one of us has to die. My mom quickly puts her protective arms around me and Sofia. I feel her beating heart against her chest.
An ear breaking laugh from the back of the kitchen breaks the silence. Everyone turns into that direction and a tall shirtless man steps forward. With his penetrating blue eyes, and moving hair locks. I recognize him instantly and so the rest of the family. My heart beats faster and faster and is as if time stays still as I watch Samyaza walk towards my grandma. He claps his hands again and again then says, “I can’t believe you actually told them, and showed them the dagger.” Takes the silver dagger from the table and examines it. He smiles, and moves it between his hands with such fast skill that is hard to see.
“I said I would do it, didn't I?” My grandma asks and bows her head then kneels at the feet of Samyaza.
My mind goes wild with speculations of what it means. Then, I feel my mom tensing arms as if she was shaking.
“I know. It was so exciting watching everyone’s faces and emotions change from one moment to the other. And I am still amazed how they changing right now. Why are all of you kneeling as well?” Samyaza asks and we all kneel at once I hit my head getting down to my knee. I feel a little bit dizzy, but I try to shake the feeling. Fear returns to my body, I can just imagine my grandma alone in that mountain in the middle of the night surrounded by all the Watchers and him. I try to hide those images away from my head. He walks around the table, and I feel his eyes against my neck. It feels as if cold fingers were tightening around the back of my neck and I am forced to lower my head.
Samyaza taps the table and makes it disappear. I watch my dad from the corner of my eye as he tries to get up, but he is pushed down by those invisible fingers. “Do not worry Son; you will not be hurt as long as you follow his directions.” Grandma says in a strong commanding voice, one I have never heard before.
“Maria is right.” Samyaza says and continues to encircle us. It feels like torture not knowing what he wants. He stops in front of Gabriela and crouches next to her. “You are Gabriela right?” he asks. Gabriela nods, and her cheeks turn red. Samyaza smiles and traces with his finger around Gabriela nose and lips then around her chin. I feel my hand tightening in repulsion. I cannot imagine what she is feeling. But, she stays still. “Yes, the vivid image of you Maria.” He says and stands up.
To be continued...
It is almost time to leave and I am still awake. I am too excited, and can hardly wait to hear the knock from my dad to signal that it is time to leave. Last night mom sent us all to sleep at eight, by then we had everything ready that we were going to take on our trip. She of course stayed up until late I heard her with my sharp ears that’s probably the reason I am still awake. This will be my first year that I will be allowed to go with my family and cousins to the “Lighting of the Gold.”
I hear a soft knock on my old wooden door, and my dad calls my name. “Rafael it is time.” He says and walks off to the bathroom. He likes to be first to take a shower.
I get up at once and my eyes feel itchy. I open and close them a few times before I put my glasses on. I feel the coldness up to my spine as I tiptoe to my closet. I do not feel like showering, but I take out my blue towel and wrap it around my body. I like the smell of it. My mom just washed it yesterday and it smells like Sun and roses. It also reminds me of the warm embraces from my mom. I smile.
I light the little green light of my wrist watch and it shows that it is already 2:45 am. I take a deep breath and try to relax while I wait for my father to finish his shower. When I hear the bathroom door click I jump and exit my bedroom. My dad comes out shaved and pink as a tomato. He likes his water almost boiling. I smile and enter the bathroom. The aroma of vapor always fascinates me, and I inhale it deeply as I take my pajamas and glasses off.
I step into the shower and turn the dial. A cold squirt of water greets my back and I begin to shiver. Then I slowly turn the dial up to warm the water a bit. I like this sequence always wakes up my mind to vivid fantasies. My twelve year old mind drifts to the possibilities of what might happen if we are successful this year. Even though I have never been to the “Lighting of the Gold,” I have heard how it goes and how people fortunes turn overnight; with piles of gold and many hidden treasures.
Even if my family lives modestly and I never go to bed with an empty belly. I still see my mother constantly suffering the daily duty of cleaning up the house and her strong headaches. With that extra money we could probably hire some help and get her to the capital to get checked. I sight.
I shampoo my hair, and close my eyes. I like how the shampoo runs between my fingers and my hair, and I run them faster and faster. It feels like a good backrub that my mom gives me when I put my head on her lap. I smile with my eyes closed and rinse my hair with warm water. I feel fully awaken now, even if I did not sleep. I step out of the shower and dry off. The mirror is covered in vapor, and I draw a smile on it with a pair of big round eyes. I put my eyes directly in front of it, and my light brown eyes look back at me. I smile, and put on my vaporized glasses. I know they will return to normal once I step into the not so warm hall.
I step out of the bathroom and see that my mom is already up and she is just finishing making the sandwiches. I walk to my bedroom and my clothes are already waiting on my bed; just ironed and new. I do not know how my mom manages to do everything so fast. I put on my navy blue jeans and white t-shirt. They still feel warm and nice. I wonder if Gabriela is already up. She is my favorite cousin and this is her first year too.
I check my watch once again. It is 3:13 am. I put on my new boots and black jacket. I lazily comb my hair with my fingers and make my bed. I can hear some of my aunts and uncles arriving. The front door opens and closes. I make my way to the kitchen and give my mom a hug from behind while is stirring the hot chocolate pot.
She pokes me with her elbow softly and smiles. “You look hungry.” She says, and I pretend to bite her shoulder.
“Good morning, Rafa.”
I turn around and see Gabriela at the door smiling with her new dress and boots. My heart jumps in joy, I smile and let go of my mom. I am too old to be playing like this with my mom I think. My cheeks burn red hot and I stumble to take a seat at the end of the table. Gabriela takes a seat next to me.
“So, are you’re ready?” She asks.
“I guess so.” I say picking bread from the basket. My mom pours me a hot mug of chocolate and another to Gabriela.
“I couldn't sleep last night. Just look at my nails.” She says and shows me her bitten nails.
“I also couldn't sleep. I keep imagining how it is going to be.” I say and deep a piece of my bread into the hot chocolate. I suck the warm liquid chocolate out of the soaked bread. It is delicious.
“Why are you still not ready?” My mom asks my sister that drags herself to the table with her long black hair that hangs dripping wet around her shoulders. She combs back her hair with her fingers and yawns.
“I am still sleepy, “she yawns once again and she puts her elbows over the table. “Why do we have to wake up so early?” she asks.
“This is not early at all Sofia. My father used to make us camp up there.” My mom says and puts a mug of hot chocolate in front of Sofia.
Sofia breaks her bread and dips it in her hot chocolate. This brings back memories of us spending previous years alone with Gabriela, Sofia, and me left behind at the house because I and Gabriela were still too young to go up the mountain. Sofia is two years older than me, but she sure preferred to be left behind and pretend to babysit us while she spent most of the day sleeping and listening to her records.
“Yes, I remember my first time I went up there with your great-grandfather.” My grandmother Maria says and looks up as to capture those memories and continues. “I was fourteen I think, it was not that common back then for girls to be up the mountain. But I was a stubborn girl and I remember asking my father to take me up there day after day and until he got tired I guess he just said. ‘Fine, get ready we leaving are in five minutes.’ He got the horse ready and called me. My mother was worried, and tried to stop him. But, he just pushed her aside and said. ‘Woman, get out of my way. Your daughter is driving me crazy.’ He just lifted me up and we rode up in the middle of the night.” She pauses and smiles, and then takes a bite out of her soaked bread.
She continues. “The little hairs of my neck stood up as we continued to ride up the mountain. The howling of the wolves and the weird sounds of the night was making regret having asked my dad to take me up there. I held tight to my dad, and I am sure my long nails were sinking deep into my father stomach but he said nothing and continued to ride as normal. The wind began to pick up and my thin jacket offered little protection. I was not prepared to ride at all. But my dad was like that, always impulsive and without much thought to what was he was doing.” My grandma’ pauses and her eyes get a little watery.
“After a few minutes he noticed my shaking and he stopped the horse. He took off his leather jacket and wrapped it around my shoulders. I felt so warm and protected.” She sighs. “The trees around us became thicker and under the half-moon I began to see shadows move between the trees. I closed my eyes tight to try and ignore what I was seeing. But, I felt as if something was watching us from the distance and felt my shoulders getting heavier as if something was hanging from them.” My grandma says and makes the usual scary face whenever she tells one of her stories. I am used to it. But, it still gets my heart going with some sort of fear.
“Then what happened grandma?” Gabriela asks. She has not listened to this story before I guess. I have plenty of times, since grandma has been living with us for the last 3 years.
My grandma looks up to the kitchen ceiling and sighs. “Well that feeling of being watched never left me all the while we were up there. But, it got stronger as we continued to go up. The howling of wolves rang on my ears, and the owls watching us from the high trees with their yellow eyes. I tried to keep my eyes up, but my neck was getting tired and whenever I lowered them I just closed them. My dad said nothing. Perhaps he was used to it, and maybe he was enjoying teaching me a lesson.” She smiles with her straight white teeth showing. “When we arrived to the top of the mountain it was covered with a cold mist. I began to shake once again. My dad got off the horse and helped to get down, and then we sat on a cold stone. I felt my butt freezing all the way to my neck.” She laughs.
I begin to imagine a younger version of my grandma and can’t help to wonder how rebellious she was back then. My sister Sofia is a lot like her, I guess it runs on the family. But a big difference is that one can hardly drag my sister out of the house. She and her records is what make her happy.
“My dad put his arms around me and began to sing, just like he used to sing when I was little.” My grandma continues with a tear running down her wrinkled cheek. “I felt protected even if that feeling of being watched continued. I also felt that I was once again my dad little girl. The moon began to hide and the howling of the wolves stopped. Somehow the silence that followed felt scarier than when the owls where making their noises and the wolves were howling. A rushing breezing lifted my hair against my father face and more continued to come in waves. The whistling of wind between the tree leaves and the grass had me looking everywhere for those heavy eyes that I felt watching me come and eat me.” She pauses and everyone on the table stop eating. My hands sweating and Gabriela holds to my right arm tight. I check my watch nervously and it is already 3:44 am.
My dad arrives from finishing loading the truck and my mom serves him his hot chocolate and his favorite bread. His nose is bright red. It must be cold outside. He looks around our silent faces and laughs. “Mother, are you telling them that old story again?” He asks and dips his bread on the hot chocolate.
“It is new to me uncle.” Gabriela says and she lets go of my arm.
My grandma adjusts her glasses and continues. “Anyway, stories that my grandma used to tell me about the mountain began to rush into my mind. The many stories of creatures roaming around the mountain at night and of trouble making kids going missing to never been seen again, probably eaten by one of those creatures my grandma described so vivid; creatures with sharp fangs, and the walked in two legs, and growled like mountain lions.” She says showing her front fangs and imitating the growling of a mountain lion. A chill runs up and down my spine.
“Stop that mother you scaring the kids.” My dad says.
“Let her continue, Samuel. Ma tell them the real story, they are old enough.” My uncle has been seating at the table snoozing off and on says.
My mind goes off. What does he mean by the ‘real story’? I have listened to my grandma tell the same story over and over again. It ends with her and her father riding down the mountain as a pack of wolves chased them down. It is very scary story on itself with the big black wolves chasing after them and their horse almost jumping off from a cliff taking them with him. My heart beats faster with anticipation as I wait my father reaction.
He stays quiet and continues to drink his hot chocolate.
My grandma wraps her gray shawl tight as if trying to get protected from something and then, lets out a cough. “Alright, as I was saying the wind kept blowing and I felt the uneasiness of my dad. This was not normal I realized. He was used to camping alone up the mountain and knew them better than anyone, and still I felt his nervousness. ‘What is wrong pa’?’ I asked him. He just shook his head. I began to be really afraid and tried to stay still. The fog began to move in replacing the cold mist and covered the rest of the night out. We could not see more than a few feet in front of us. Our horse even when he was in front of us disappeared out of sight. My put his protective arms around be and took out his long knife out of his belt.” My grandma says and falls silent for a few seconds. Gabriela sinks her fingers on my arm.
My grandma touches her right cheek and continues, “I felt long cold bonny fingers touching my right cheek. I felt paralyzed and unable to scream. Cold sweat ran down my body. I heard my father as if he was miles away; even he was still holding me. He was praying he told me after this. The cold fingers traced the outline of my face.” My grandma says and we are left with our mouths open. I feel as if the room has gotten colder.
She continues, “I felt as my body was moving on its own and before I knew it I was kneeling. I did not feel my father arms letting go of me, when I scanned for him he had been pushed against a big rock and he was with his eyes closed. Tears pouring down my face, and I tried to run towards him but I was unable to move.” She pauses and closes her yes. “Give me a second.” She says and breathes in and out.
“Mother, is alright you do not have to tell them. It is always hard for you.” My dad says putting his hand over my grandma shoulder.
She shakes her head and continues, “No it is important for them to listen to the whole story. It might be the last time I tell it.” She says, and I feel as if the air is being sucked out of me. A life without my grandma cannot imagine it. I feel a knot forming in my throat. She regains her composure and says, “As I was kneeling there on the cold ground, I felt something breathe on my neck. It smelled like dried roses. I turned my head to see what it was, but there was nothing other than my unconscious father. Then, I felt the breath on my ear that transformed into a whisper. ‘Maria Sinful,’ the whisper was soft and somehow I felt calmer. It was a strange voice, but felt so familiar. I remained speechless. ‘Speak daughter of Adam.’ The whisper said. I heard more footsteps approached, and felt the presence of multiple eyes looking at me as if they were circling me.” She says and lifts hand and with her skinny finger points around as in a circle motion.
“Who were they grandma?” Gabriela asks in a shaky voice.
“They have many names Gaby; some call them demons, some others spirits, and some creatures of the night. But, just like everything they can be all that people say and more.” My grandma says. My mind begins to imagine creatures with long horns and skinny fingers with long sharp nails. But it must be the influence of some of my classmates telling such stories when we go by the cemetery.
My grandma finishes her chocolate and sighs cleaning her little chocolate whiskers off with her shawl. “I was there frozen like an ice statue, and I felt as if my knees were cemented to the ground. The creatures around me began to materialize. It was still dark and foggy, so but they had a blue, red, and orange auroras around their bodies. It made them come alive as if they were fairies in many of the stories I read. But they were not fairies. After my eyes got adjusted to their emitting lights I saw tall naked figures with long legs and skinny bodies. I felt something that was worse than horror that moment, I felt as if my young heart was stopping.” She says more tears run down her eyes, and she puts her hand over her heart and continues. “Pale skin was stuck to their bodies, eyeless, and with lips turned inside as if they were being sucked into their bodies. When they whispered their mouths hardly moved and the cracking of their teeth or who knows what, sent chills down my spine. It was as if hundreds of insects were moving inside their mouths.” She says.
I begin to wonder whatever it was a wise decision to encourage my grandma to tell the story. Now I wish I had never heard of any of this, she is usually light on the details and the way she most of the time says things in a joke way of thing. But, I know she is serious when she uses her factual voice. Is like is another person is talking. I take a deep breath, and hold my tongue. Quietly I look down at my watch it is 4:10 am. Fifteen minutes of so to go I think.
Gabriela is so nervous that she now almost biting my arm. And I feel her sweaty hands soaking my jacket. I pretend not to notice and continue to listen to my grandma. “The voice besides my ear whispered once again and said, ‘Maria listen well to what I have to say, because there is no time to repeat it again.’ It said and then it appeared before me. It was a creature like I had never seen before, Tall, slim, with a man’s body.” My grandma pauses. “He was naked. With black wings hanging from his back and long hair locks that moved like ripples in water. I think they were alive.” She says.
Everyone in the room is left speechless. My mom has the face of wanting to question, and so does my father. Perhaps they did not hear my grandma telling of these explicit details the other times she told what happened that night. Sofia breaks the silence by asking a question that was in my mind the instant my grandma mentioned the wings. “Was he an Angel, grandma?” Sofia says now paying attention.
“That is what I thought as soon as I saw him, but he somehow read my mind and said. ‘No, I am not an Angel of the Lord. I was once, but now I am just a Fallen Angel. My name is Samyaza, and these around you are the Watchers.’ He said and one of the Watchers came forth and licked my forehead.” My grandma says, and rubs arms with her hands. It is as if the memory of what happened were still imprinted on her body. “I stayed still as the Watcher touched me with his cold tongue. Then Samyaza said, ‘stop at once Sariel.’ And Sariel stopped and floated back to the rest. Samyaza continued, ‘they are hungry, haven’t have a woman in a long time and your soul just looks so enticing. ‘He said smiling. I felt a little embarrassed when he said that. His beautiful eyes shining on the darkness and her nakedness, and most of all his changed voice that was now deep and inviting like an untenable fruit. I knew I was supposed to be fearful, but I could not help it, and smiled.” My grandma says and looks at the distance with a smile.
“Anyway, Samyaza told me a little about themselves and how they ‘fell’ from heaven. Of course, everyone has their versions he said. But it did not matter, he said because what mattered now was the present. He told me how my ancestors could be traced back to his old friend, Shamsiel that took as wife a human and he had make the sacrifice of becoming mortal. Then, the Great War of Earth came. He fought with the humans that tried to liberate themselves from Fate. ‘He was foolish to think that one could kill Fate. He was blindsided with rage. His wife was killed after giving birth to his third son. He blamed it on Fate. And perhaps he was right since one of Fate creatures dried the blood of his wife… all the signs were there. But, that is that. When they were within Fate domain they planned to set a nuclear bomb off, and they planned to kill themselves inside that domain. But Fate had seen it in her dreams and opened the gates of Fate. The blast was so powerful that it almost destroyed half of the planet, and if it had not been for the protections that God, had put in place most living things would had been destroyed. Millions of humans were killed. Fate herself survived and more raged than ever. Most of her kingdom was destroyed and her source for energy deeply disturbed. But she flourished with the many unfinished fates from the humans that were killed. It meant she got her reward way before the time of those humans that died was up. She eventually constructed a new and more powerful kingdom, and now is in a completely different dimension. She does not want to make that mistake of having living humans walking into her domain unexpected. But, I think I will stop there with that side of the story. It will confuse you.’ Samyaza said. My head was indeed full of complex questions, I could not grasp why an ancestor of mine would do such a thing.” My grandma says with regret on her voice.
“I felt like those hours were eternal as Samyaza kept explaining to me what had happened since that Great of War of Earth, and how Fate and God and even Lucifer agreed that it would be best to send us humans back in time at least a thousand years before the bomb went off. The planet was in such a bad shape and their source of souls was bad. ‘It was really bad for everyone; I even had to feed of mutt creatures, and even humans tasted bad…. Depressed and badly fed, empty of emotion and desires. Anyway, they met at the top of Mount Everest and talked for days for the first time after a million of years. They all agreed that it was better to move humans to another dimension that was almost the same as this one but, with far more restrictions and safety precautions. God carried out the plan the night of February first and most humans were transferred to the other dimension free of their nuclear poisoning and from most of her memories. Of course, nothing is the same across dimensions but this one feels very similar to that previous one. Here you have shorter summers, and long rain months. Also there are a few differences that we don’t have time to explain and you really do not have to worry about those. The only one you have to worry is the one I am going to tell you.’ Samyaza paused, and lowered his voice. ‘What do you think happens after you die?’ he asked me. I was speechless, for a moment then after a bit of thinking I said. ‘Dust thou art, and unto dust shalt thou return.’ Samyaza smiled and said, ‘Reciting like a good human you are. Of course your body will turn naturally turn into dust in a few decades. It used to take a hundred years or more in the other dimension. Do you know why? Well not answer it is complicated. This dimension is being used as a one uses a wine cellar.’ He said my mind was trying to comprehend everything at once.” My grandma paused and closed her eyes trying to remember hard exactly what was said.
I keep imagining the dimension that was left behind, with all the wasteland devastated and it makes me sad. It is interesting how the world changes in front of us or at least our perspective of it when someone tells us some of its ‘hidden’ secrets are revealed. If what Samyaza said is true, then we must find out what is behind all this. I cannot help but to wonder what happened to that dimension. Maybe it is a world full of wild monsters and unknown creatures living on the abandoned houses and schools. It would make for an amazing adventure just to step into that world I think. As long as one is protected one could be safe, if only one had god like powers. I smile.
I observe everyone on the table listening to my grandma talking in her inviting voice that makes you feel calm and sets your imagination in fire. Gabriela has stopped biting her nails, and seems to be entranced with everyone my grandma says. Sofia is making her usual face when she is deep in thought, like when she is memorizing new lines of the lyrics from her new records. My mom drinks from her favorite mug steaming chocolate, and my dad shakes his leg up and down sending small vibrations over the table. My uncle seems to be in some sort of trance too. I take a deep breath and sigh. If only one of those cameras that take photos were here, it would record an unforgettable memory. I save the image in my mind.
My grandma continues to tell us the story. She tells us how Samyaza told her that when the transition to this dimension happened, a few million humans were left behind. ‘The undesirables,’ those were humans that apparently had low chance of survival because they were either too infected with radiation poisoning or their mental state of mind was messed up. He also explained how God, Lucifer, and even Fate were surprised when they did not die and instead became a new thriving human race that was forced to adapt quickly or die. They were both fast and intelligent, even with their intelligence there were many conflicts and many wars. Because ‘chaos’ had become their way of life they knew nothing better than to try and outsmart each other by going to war with each other in a large scale.
Lucifer was apparently enjoying this little turn of events too much. He was receiving souls full of hatred and desire by the thousands each day that it was creating a conflict both in Hell and in Heaven. Angels were angry because their supposed source of food was going elsewhere. Even if God had abandoned those humans, Angels felt it was their right to also take a bit of that bounty, after all even if God had abandoned the humans in that dimension they still had to offer some sort of protection. Even if it was weak, they were bound by their nature. Eventually, many Angels rebelled and sworn to themselves to save a few humans if it was possible. When they arrived to that dimension, they found it in the middle of an intense war going on. People killing each other and neighbor against neighbor. Greedy demons feeding on still living humans. Angels at once engaged in at intense war by cleaning streets of demons with their holy swords and bows. Samyaza was among them, he was a leader of many squadrons of Angels that were integrating to their cause, of helping save these humans. Eventually the powerful demons came forth and everything transformed into a bloody field. Angels and demons fought among the humans, killing thousands in a question of minutes.
Archangel Michael came down to stop the fighting, and Lucifer appeared as well. Michael tried to control the Angels that were killing the humans that tried to protect the demons. Lucifer at once ordered his demons to stop. Many of the Angels and demons obeyed the orders but others did not. They blood was hot with rage and Samyaza said it felt ‘good’ after so many years without war. They felt intoxicated to have for once a strong enemy in front of them. God seeing how the events unfolded sent down a torment that lasted for seven days. Humans were forced to stop being shields for demons or angels and the fighting slowly died as more Angels arrived to restrain the rebel Angels and those were given black wings after the seven day of rain stopped. Michael judged harshly, and even Fate came to the event with her minions.
After, the Holy trial ended. Many of the rebel Angels were turned into mortals those with less grave sins. But, the ones that had sin the worst were sentenced to live for eternity with their black wings and most of their powers removed. It was a sign of shame and the worst punishment there was, Samyaza told my grandma. Humans that witnessed the fighting between the Angels and the demons had their memory erased and they were left separate in remote places of the world. Eventually, Michael delivered other news that from that moment on the old rules before the Great War of Earth, were going to be coming into effect and with the restriction that in that dimension humans would not be able to see Angels or demons. Only Archangels and Lucifer had that right. Of course we know that Lucifer was once an Archangel. Angels and demons were not happy, but nevertheless did not dare to cause any more trouble.
Centuries passed and the world in that dimension once again knew ‘peace.’ But of course, even that world was flourishing God, Fate, or even Lucifer did not want to ‘bring’ back the humans they had taken from there. I am starting to hate those three for some reason my mind goes crazy with the possibilities of meeting humans from that other dimension. I am sure if they knew we were in this other dimension, they might be curious to meet us too.
My grandma continues after she takes a few breaths. “Samyaza told me all this, or perhaps he said it to me in a previous life. Anyway, whatever the reason I think it is important. The reason Samyaza said we were like a wine in a wine cellar, is because our souls are different from those of the other dimension. He said, ‘your souls are recycled instead of going either to Heaven or Hell. It is because either Lucifer or God could reach an agreement on what to do with all of you. Then, they discovered that recycled souls are so delicious that they have become a delicacy on heaven and hell. Because, they had lived the same life over and over again with different fates, but they are basically almost the same person.’ Samyaza said and touched my heart with his cold fingers that I felt penetrating my skin and tissue. Tears rolled down eyes and the pain was almost unbearable. But, after a few seconds it disappeared but I still felt his fingers around my heart. I felt as it was going to melt. I can’t describe the feeling.” My grandma says and touches her heart as if it was melting right now.
“How is that possible, Mother?” My dad asks almost flipping the table over. Sending plates and mugs down into the floor and we all look towards my grandma that remains silent.
My mom holds him back and he sits down still angry at something. I do not understand why he is having that reaction. “Calm down, Son. Let me explain.” She says and continues. “I asked the same question to Samyaza and he said, ‘it is possible because this dimension repeats itself every couple hundred years. Some scientific humans that study time call it a ‘time loop.’ Of course they do not know how close they are to finding the truth, but it is basically what happens here. I have spoken to you a few dozen times in the past that’s why I knew you were going to be here, and somehow you know inside you. My theory is that your soul retains some memories of the past. Your heart still feels the same as did last time, and I still feel that key inside you to break this time loop. After all it was Shamsiel who created this loophole.’ He said and took his fingers of my heart.”
“So, grandma you are telling us we living inside this ‘time loop’?” Sofia asks.
“Yes, and he thinks we have it in our blood or something to break this time loop. He told me that he has told me this many times, and when I asked why I did not break the loop he said, ‘because it requires you to sacrifice what you hold dear, and you have refused. Perhaps I have been too harsh or too soft with my delivery method to make you understand that this sacrifice is necessary. But, now I will just tell you what is at stake. It is up to you to now. It might work if it is in Fate cards to be played this way. The barrier between this dimension and the other is becoming weak. When it finally breaks both dimensions will cease to exist, and no one will be left. At least not humans, and God has been unable to fix this, I guess Shamsiel designed this too well. I think he wanted to leave Fate out of the picture in his mind and let this ‘key’ do the work he was unable to finish. Or at least not yet, he is not dead… I can feel his pulsating aurora once in a while like a wave. But, so far we have been unable to find him. In any case, I do not know how many more loops this dimension can take. I am honestly tired of waiting for you.’ Samyaza said with reproaching voice. I felt a little guilt on my soul for being selfish in previous lives. Perhaps, Samyaza was right on being upset with me.” My grandma pauses and looks around the table.
“A sacrifice that is dear to you. I can imagine. No mother or daughter would want to give those dear to her up.” My mom says.
“Maybe, but it could be worse the fate of both dimension fall into our shoulders. We the Sinful family needs to pay for what some of ancestors did. And do not give that look I am not crazy. I would honestly not hesitate to give up my life in order to save millions. But, sadly it is not me who is going to be the sacrifice. Fate has her ways. I asked if it was not me who will be the sacrifice Samyaza answered. ‘It is just up to you to facilitate the one that will be the sacrifice by telling him or her, what I have told you. And when the moment comes, you will know what to do.’ He said then handed me this silver dagger.” My grandma says and takes from her belt a beautiful dagger that I have never seen before. She puts it on the table.
Everyone stays still. The kitchen instantly turns into a zone of tension. As we take in what she had just told us. Basically one of us has to die. My mom quickly puts her protective arms around me and Sofia. I feel her beating heart against her chest.
An ear breaking laugh from the back of the kitchen breaks the silence. Everyone turns into that direction and a tall shirtless man steps forward. With his penetrating blue eyes, and moving hair locks. I recognize him instantly and so the rest of the family. My heart beats faster and faster and is as if time stays still as I watch Samyaza walk towards my grandma. He claps his hands again and again then says, “I can’t believe you actually told them, and showed them the dagger.” Takes the silver dagger from the table and examines it. He smiles, and moves it between his hands with such fast skill that is hard to see.
“I said I would do it, didn't I?” My grandma asks and bows her head then kneels at the feet of Samyaza.
My mind goes wild with speculations of what it means. Then, I feel my mom tensing arms as if she was shaking.
“I know. It was so exciting watching everyone’s faces and emotions change from one moment to the other. And I am still amazed how they changing right now. Why are all of you kneeling as well?” Samyaza asks and we all kneel at once I hit my head getting down to my knee. I feel a little bit dizzy, but I try to shake the feeling. Fear returns to my body, I can just imagine my grandma alone in that mountain in the middle of the night surrounded by all the Watchers and him. I try to hide those images away from my head. He walks around the table, and I feel his eyes against my neck. It feels as if cold fingers were tightening around the back of my neck and I am forced to lower my head.
Samyaza taps the table and makes it disappear. I watch my dad from the corner of my eye as he tries to get up, but he is pushed down by those invisible fingers. “Do not worry Son; you will not be hurt as long as you follow his directions.” Grandma says in a strong commanding voice, one I have never heard before.
“Maria is right.” Samyaza says and continues to encircle us. It feels like torture not knowing what he wants. He stops in front of Gabriela and crouches next to her. “You are Gabriela right?” he asks. Gabriela nods, and her cheeks turn red. Samyaza smiles and traces with his finger around Gabriela nose and lips then around her chin. I feel my hand tightening in repulsion. I cannot imagine what she is feeling. But, she stays still. “Yes, the vivid image of you Maria.” He says and stands up.
To be continued...
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